"Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter.” //Francis Chan; Crazy Love Upon touching down in SG during the early morning hours of Saturday, I was picked up by my boyfriend and he told me that he just found out one of his best friends has just been diagnosed with acute leukaemia. His friend had been having a persistent fever for the past week or so and he finally checked into hospital, suspecting that it may be dengue. Unfortunately, it turned out to be something far far more serious. Because the condition is acute, he has had to be warded and he will start chemotherapy in a few days' time. We visited him in hospital that night and it was kinda surreal to step into the ward and see all the IV drips and needles stuck into his arms. And I think the sheer suddenness and seriousness of this whole thing has really made us stop in our tracks and re-consider for a moment where our priorities are. More and more, I've come to realise, that our life on earth is really just one small square of a beautiful tapestry that stretches on and on into eternity, and it doesn't make any sense at all to be wholly consumed about making this small square so pretty when there is so much more ahead of me. That sometimes, the things that I esteem and hold as so important, may not really be that crucial in God's eyes. Does God really care how well I dress? Does He care about how many bags and clothes I own, what type of shoes I put on, what kind of makeup I put on my face? Does He fuss about how successful I am at work, how much money I earn? Or does He look straight into my heart and see completely what type of person I am, what kind of things I prioritize in my life? And when he sees straight into my heart, when he looks at the bits and pieces that make up my life, will He be pleased with what I have done? Will he say, well done good and faithful servant, you have fought the good fight, finished the race and kept the faith? Will he see that I have invested my life in touching people, making disciples of His, being broken for the things that he was broken for? I don't know if he will. And that scares me. Enough to want to come into his presence again and ask him to re-calibrate my heart, to re-focus my eyes to be fixed on the Cross. To be willing, always willing to do what he has called me to do.
"Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter.” //Francis Chan; Crazy Love Upon touching down in SG during the early morning hours of Saturday, I was picked up by my boyfriend and he told me that he just found out one of his best friends has just been diagnosed with acute leukaemia. His friend had been having a persistent fever for the past week or so and he finally checked into hospital, suspecting that it may be dengue. Unfortunately, it turned out to be something far far more serious. Because the condition is acute, he has had to be warded and he will start chemotherapy in a few days' time. We visited him in hospital that night and it was kinda surreal to step into the ward and see all the IV drips and needles stuck into his arms. And I think the sheer suddenness and seriousness of this whole thing has really made us stop in our tracks and re-consider for a moment where our priorities are. More and more, I've come to realise, that our life on earth is really just one small square of a beautiful tapestry that stretches on and on into eternity, and it doesn't make any sense at all to be wholly consumed about making this small square so pretty when there is so much more ahead of me. That sometimes, the things that I esteem and hold as so important, may not really be that crucial in God's eyes. Does God really care how well I dress? Does He care about how many bags and clothes I own, what type of shoes I put on, what kind of makeup I put on my face? Does He fuss about how successful I am at work, how much money I earn? Or does He look straight into my heart and see completely what type of person I am, what kind of things I prioritize in my life? And when he sees straight into my heart, when he looks at the bits and pieces that make up my life, will He be pleased with what I have done? Will he say, well done good and faithful servant, you have fought the good fight, finished the race and kept the faith? Will he see that I have invested my life in touching people, making disciples of His, being broken for the things that he was broken for? I don't know if he will. And that scares me. Enough to want to come into his presence again and ask him to re-calibrate my heart, to re-focus my eyes to be fixed on the Cross. To be willing, always willing to do what he has called me to do.
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