"Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe."
//Barbara de Angelis
Thanks for giving me credit that I didn't really deserve and for thinking of me better than I really am. And for teaching me that in the end, no one is really worth giving it up for.
And did you really think that whatever was said would not eventually make its way to me? There's no need for accusations, explanations or justifications. You know as well as I do. Like I said, disappoint away, it's who you let get to you that matters.
"They have worries, they're counting the miles, they're thinking about where to sleep tonight, how much money for gas, the weather, how they'll get there -- and all the time they'll get there anyway, you see."
//Jack Kerouac; On the Road
Two really enjoyable weeks of school. Fairly interesting subjects, charming professors, best friends. An unbelievably awesome start to year 4, the beginning of the end. We'll get there sometime, somehow.
Today I learnt in physical science class that antimatter is a dangerous thing. In a nutshell, I understood antimatter to be the evil twin of matter. So theoretically, if any material substance were to accidentally bump into its antimatter twin, their complementary characteristics would react to cancel each other out, essentially performing what is called a dance of death. The advice our prof jokingly gave us was, never ever seek out your antimatter or you would be consumed. Wow, I don't know what to make of that, but it is just so completely fascinating and oddly poetic.
"Something new, they had said. They had a perfect day for it. A day with the blue and gold good weather of anyone's primitive childhood expectations, when the new, brief memory tells itself that this is what is, and therefore was, and therefore will be. A good day to see a new place."
//AS Byatt; Possession
In a moment, we will have used it all away. But for now, we can hold on together in canteens and cafes with conversations and heartohearts, pretending that we still have all the time in the world. Soon, even quicker than soon, we will come to the point where we stand on our own, but for now, for now, we are here and all other those times are running somewhere else.
"There is a point at which everything becomes simple and there is no longer any question of choice, because all you have staked will be lost if you look back. Life’s point of no return."
//Dag Hammarskjöld
It almost feels like waking up from a difficult dream to find that everything was hurled out of place and then re-arranged. Not exactly where you yourself would have placed them if you could have, but arranged in the way that it always should have been. And it's all such a mess of confusion and decisions and excitement and fear, that when you finally get the time to sit down and think about the craziness of it all, I'm just really glad that it's all over. And thankful that at every step of the way, you met me more than halfway.
That you gave me people who stuck it out with me at coffee joints and fastfood places, people who stayed with me into the late nights and early mornings, people who willingly carried me through the sometimes sheer awfulness of it all. I understand that you can't explain everything to everybody, and that sometimes it's enough that those who get it do, but all the same, I know that I've learnt so much through it all. Even now I don't know for sure what lies ahead or how I'm going to make it through the rest of the way, but I know that I will always be safe when you've got my back.
"Living with integrity means: Not settling for less than what you know you deserve in your relationships. Asking for what you want and need from others. Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension. Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe."
//Barbara de Angelis
Thanks for giving me credit that I didn't really deserve and for thinking of me better than I really am. And for teaching me that in the end, no one is really worth giving it up for.
And did you really think that whatever was said would not eventually make its way to me? There's no need for accusations, explanations or justifications. You know as well as I do. Like I said, disappoint away, it's who you let get to you that matters.
"They have worries, they're counting the miles, they're thinking about where to sleep tonight, how much money for gas, the weather, how they'll get there -- and all the time they'll get there anyway, you see."
//Jack Kerouac; On the Road
Two really enjoyable weeks of school. Fairly interesting subjects, charming professors, best friends. An unbelievably awesome start to year 4, the beginning of the end. We'll get there sometime, somehow.
Today I learnt in physical science class that antimatter is a dangerous thing. In a nutshell, I understood antimatter to be the evil twin of matter. So theoretically, if any material substance were to accidentally bump into its antimatter twin, their complementary characteristics would react to cancel each other out, essentially performing what is called a dance of death. The advice our prof jokingly gave us was, never ever seek out your antimatter or you would be consumed. Wow, I don't know what to make of that, but it is just so completely fascinating and oddly poetic.
"Something new, they had said. They had a perfect day for it. A day with the blue and gold good weather of anyone's primitive childhood expectations, when the new, brief memory tells itself that this is what is, and therefore was, and therefore will be. A good day to see a new place."
//AS Byatt; Possession
In a moment, we will have used it all away. But for now, we can hold on together in canteens and cafes with conversations and heartohearts, pretending that we still have all the time in the world. Soon, even quicker than soon, we will come to the point where we stand on our own, but for now, for now, we are here and all other those times are running somewhere else.
"There is a point at which everything becomes simple and there is no longer any question of choice, because all you have staked will be lost if you look back. Life’s point of no return."
//Dag Hammarskjöld
It almost feels like waking up from a difficult dream to find that everything was hurled out of place and then re-arranged. Not exactly where you yourself would have placed them if you could have, but arranged in the way that it always should have been. And it's all such a mess of confusion and decisions and excitement and fear, that when you finally get the time to sit down and think about the craziness of it all, I'm just really glad that it's all over. And thankful that at every step of the way, you met me more than halfway.
That you gave me people who stuck it out with me at coffee joints and fastfood places, people who stayed with me into the late nights and early mornings, people who willingly carried me through the sometimes sheer awfulness of it all. I understand that you can't explain everything to everybody, and that sometimes it's enough that those who get it do, but all the same, I know that I've learnt so much through it all. Even now I don't know for sure what lies ahead or how I'm going to make it through the rest of the way, but I know that I will always be safe when you've got my back.
