"Odd pushed himself to keep walking, one step at the time, remembering when he had walked with ease and never thought twice about the miracle of putting one foot in front of the other and pushing the world towards you."
//Neil Gaiman; Odd and the Frost Giants
All down, only one thing left to do. I'm tired beyond belief but my jumping off point is here.
And I'm think I'm ready to go. If I'm not ready now, then I don't know if I ever will be.
"God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfil?"
//Numbers 23:19 (NIV)
Who am I that you are mindful of me? What have I given to make you care for me? Yet, when you bless, as usual I am overwhelmed by your favour. From now till the end of my journey, guide me. Overshadow me. Be on my left and on my right. Be at my front and at my back. Cover me from above and from beneath. Be in every eye that sees me, in every tongue that speaks to me, in every heart that perceives me.
"You know, it’s quite a job to start loving somebody. You have to have energy, generosity, blindness. There is even a moment, in the very beginning, when you have to jump across a precipice: if you think about it you don’t do it. I know I’ll never jump again." //Jean Paul Satre; Nausea
I think that I'm on the point of realising that I can't make all things right for everybody. That beyond a certain limit, if that is how things are going to fall, it's really just out of my hands. I don't think I'm giving up or ceding ground, it's just that I have better things and people to spend my time, energy and commitment on. I've really learnt a lot from all that was said, but I'm ready to move on.
"You are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed. [She] has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
//Luke 10:41 (NIV)
On Friday, somehow the topic wandered off to graduation, life in university and just looking back on those four years in general. Maybe it was because some amongst us were graduating or maybe it was because this week's assignment crunch time and a lot of people are just dealing with awful groupmates, but again it reminded me that there are barely 600plus days to go in this journey. And somehow in the past week, people have been asking about my graduation and I've been getting the same reaction mostly haha. They always say, ohmy so fast! Can't believe you're in third year already!
And when I see people reflecting on that chapter of their life, it reminds me that soon I'll be embarking on the same journey and it makes me nostalgic, reflective and pensive all at the same time. I want to make every day I have left here count. I want to make sure that I do all that I always wanted to do. I want to make sure that when I look back, I can say that I'm grateful for every day that I was given here.
"That’s the way you live this life. Each day, one at a time. Now, if you spend your whole life worryin’ about something that’s gonna happen, before you know it, your life’s over and you spent an awful lot of it just worryin’. Hey, you heard that? Now that’s what life’s all about. Laughin’ and lovin’ each other. And knowin’ that people aren’t really gone when they die. We have all the good memories to sustain us until we see ‘em again."
//Laura Ingalls Wilder; Little House on the Prairie
The official announcement was finally made today. Knowing about it for weeks already doesn't make the parting any easier. Well, it's true that we've been together a long time and I never thought that it would end. But though it's hard to say goodbye, I know that there are so many better things in store for us ahead. There's nothing to be sad about, we didn't make forever here, but forever is at the end of the road.
"I heard that your dreams came true. Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.
Old friend, why are you so shy? Ain't like you to hold back Or hide from the light
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it. I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded That for me it isn't over
Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you too Don't forget me I beg, I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love But sometimes it hurts instead." Sometimes it lasts in love But sometimes it hurts instead."
"I amar prestar aen, han mathon ne nen, han mathon ne chae a han noston ned 'wilith."
//Galadriel; The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Rewatching Lord of the Rings again from the start makes me realise that there are a lot of random, poetic lines inserted throughout the show. Especially at strange parts, like when they're hiding from the riders of Rohan and Legolas makes a random comment on the red sun meaning that blood was spilled last night. Oh wells, I still love all the parts where Elvish is spoken, makes me want to be able to speak Elvish all over again.
"Half of my heart's got a grip on the situation; half of my heart takes time."
//John Mayer; Half of my heart
I cannot begin to imagine the depth and breadth of all that is on your mind, the things that enthrall you, the things that excite you, the things that make you fall apart. I cannot begin to fathom all that you are, your complexity, your imperviousness, your realities. What would you make of this halfway house that we occupy, caught somewhere in between fear and fearlessness. What would it take to tear you into two, so that you stop running, stop hiding, stop playing make-believe.
Be staunched, my bleeding heart. You knew where reckless abandon would lead you.
"Odd pushed himself to keep walking, one step at the time, remembering when he had walked with ease and never thought twice about the miracle of putting one foot in front of the other and pushing the world towards you."
//Neil Gaiman; Odd and the Frost Giants
All down, only one thing left to do. I'm tired beyond belief but my jumping off point is here.
And I'm think I'm ready to go. If I'm not ready now, then I don't know if I ever will be.
"God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfil?"
//Numbers 23:19 (NIV)
Who am I that you are mindful of me? What have I given to make you care for me? Yet, when you bless, as usual I am overwhelmed by your favour. From now till the end of my journey, guide me. Overshadow me. Be on my left and on my right. Be at my front and at my back. Cover me from above and from beneath. Be in every eye that sees me, in every tongue that speaks to me, in every heart that perceives me.
"You know, it’s quite a job to start loving somebody. You have to have energy, generosity, blindness. There is even a moment, in the very beginning, when you have to jump across a precipice: if you think about it you don’t do it. I know I’ll never jump again." //Jean Paul Satre; Nausea
I think that I'm on the point of realising that I can't make all things right for everybody. That beyond a certain limit, if that is how things are going to fall, it's really just out of my hands. I don't think I'm giving up or ceding ground, it's just that I have better things and people to spend my time, energy and commitment on. I've really learnt a lot from all that was said, but I'm ready to move on.
"You are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed. [She] has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
//Luke 10:41 (NIV)
On Friday, somehow the topic wandered off to graduation, life in university and just looking back on those four years in general. Maybe it was because some amongst us were graduating or maybe it was because this week's assignment crunch time and a lot of people are just dealing with awful groupmates, but again it reminded me that there are barely 600plus days to go in this journey. And somehow in the past week, people have been asking about my graduation and I've been getting the same reaction mostly haha. They always say, ohmy so fast! Can't believe you're in third year already!
And when I see people reflecting on that chapter of their life, it reminds me that soon I'll be embarking on the same journey and it makes me nostalgic, reflective and pensive all at the same time. I want to make every day I have left here count. I want to make sure that I do all that I always wanted to do. I want to make sure that when I look back, I can say that I'm grateful for every day that I was given here.
"That’s the way you live this life. Each day, one at a time. Now, if you spend your whole life worryin’ about something that’s gonna happen, before you know it, your life’s over and you spent an awful lot of it just worryin’. Hey, you heard that? Now that’s what life’s all about. Laughin’ and lovin’ each other. And knowin’ that people aren’t really gone when they die. We have all the good memories to sustain us until we see ‘em again."
//Laura Ingalls Wilder; Little House on the Prairie
The official announcement was finally made today. Knowing about it for weeks already doesn't make the parting any easier. Well, it's true that we've been together a long time and I never thought that it would end. But though it's hard to say goodbye, I know that there are so many better things in store for us ahead. There's nothing to be sad about, we didn't make forever here, but forever is at the end of the road.
"I heard that your dreams came true. Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.
Old friend, why are you so shy? Ain't like you to hold back Or hide from the light
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it. I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded That for me it isn't over
Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you too Don't forget me I beg, I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love But sometimes it hurts instead." Sometimes it lasts in love But sometimes it hurts instead."
"I amar prestar aen, han mathon ne nen, han mathon ne chae a han noston ned 'wilith."
//Galadriel; The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
Rewatching Lord of the Rings again from the start makes me realise that there are a lot of random, poetic lines inserted throughout the show. Especially at strange parts, like when they're hiding from the riders of Rohan and Legolas makes a random comment on the red sun meaning that blood was spilled last night. Oh wells, I still love all the parts where Elvish is spoken, makes me want to be able to speak Elvish all over again.
"Half of my heart's got a grip on the situation; half of my heart takes time."
//John Mayer; Half of my heart
I cannot begin to imagine the depth and breadth of all that is on your mind, the things that enthrall you, the things that excite you, the things that make you fall apart. I cannot begin to fathom all that you are, your complexity, your imperviousness, your realities. What would you make of this halfway house that we occupy, caught somewhere in between fear and fearlessness. What would it take to tear you into two, so that you stop running, stop hiding, stop playing make-believe.
Be staunched, my bleeding heart. You knew where reckless abandon would lead you.
